A Bit of a Slump/Announcement

Right now I am in a bit of a slump when it comes to how I'm feeling, getting motivated and figuring out what I want to write about. I feel so awful all of the time; I'm exhausted even though I'm sleeping better than I have done in years, every little thing is getting to me and my anxiety and depression are really bad. I can't be bothered to do anything hence why, when I'm feeling OK, I always talk about how much writing I'm doing. I get it all "out of the way" as I know that feeling is only temporary and I'll go back to feeling really down and demotivated in a short while. It gives me a chance of keeping this blog on a schedule and also allows me to recover whilst still only posting promotional Tweets/Facebook posts now that my scheduler is working.

For now I'm taking a bit of a social media break, something which I know a lot of you already know about and have been really supportive of so far (thank you; it means so much), but I really would love to know if there is anything you want to see more of this month.
Here are some things I wouldn't mind doing/talking about:

Tags/Q&As
Posts on bullying, school etc
How To posts (like my untagging one)

Is there anything you would like to see? Let me know in the comments or on Twitter/Facebook and I'll see what I can do!

Speak of future posts, that brings me onto my announcement; I will be taking part in Blogtober this year! I have already written some posts on my good days for said event and have a set schedule for that. Is there anything you want to see during Blogtober? Again, please let me know in the comments; I always look forward to reading them and interacting with you all.

Thanks for being so supportive 💖

Anxiously,

Me

You Can Find Anxiously Me on:
This blog
Twitter
Facebook
& Instagram

Self-Care Q&A Response #9 with Becca

Self –Care Q &A/Tag

My friend Becca is the guest poster this week! You can find her on Twitter and on her blog right here. As always; my #ff recommendation is the guest of the week so go follow her and say “hi”!

1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

Because of my depression, i will feel really low and get very anxious. Then me and my partner know I need some 'me' time.

2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

It can vary. Sometimes I will take some time out; have a bath or read a book. Sometimes I will spend some time with my other half. Watch a movie or just cuddle.

3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

Yes extremely. With two children finding the time can be hard.

4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

The children, although I don't find it 'gets' in the way. I always have to think of them before myself.

5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

All the time!!

6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

Only when I feel I need it!

7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

Relaxing, my me time is usually a bath or a long shower or laying in my bed and reading! If I can't do that I don't usually do anything else.

8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

I read blog, books, being with my family is a great way to cheer myself up.

9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

I always say "take it one step at a time"

10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?

Do whatever makes you calm or happy. That is what makes it self care. Caring for yourself

~ Question of the week; do you have a self-care routine? Let me know in the comments below!

Anxiously,

Me

If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

You can find Anxiously, Me on:

This blog

Twitter: www.twitter.com/AnxiouslyMeBlog

Facebook: www.facebook.com/AnxiouslyMe

Instagram: www.instagram.com/AnxiouslyMeBlogger

The Versatile Blogger Award

The Versatile Blogger Award!

It’s been such an exciting time here on the blog and over on Twitter in the last two months that I can barely keep up! I reached my first goal of getting 1k views on my blog - a goal that I had set for the end of last month (27^th July to be precise) to mark 3 months of having transferred my blog over here to Blogger and ended up smashing it 23 days early. The blog is now so close to 5k views. That’s insane! It really blows my mind that there are people out there who actually want to read about what I have to say and who are so supportive. I was also nominated for my first blogger award (Liebster) and now I’m so thrilled to announce that I have been nominated for a second!

The amazing Cairon at Travel Bear nominated me for the “Versatile Blogger Award” (VBA) and I am just speechless. Someone genuinely found my writing interesting/good enough to nominate me for an award and it’s just one of the biggest compliments a blogger can ever receive. I actually got a little panicky when I logged into Twitter to see I had so many notifications, to tell you the truth, and was so relieved to see it was from this sweet, sweet creature and her other nominees. Cairon’s blog tagline is “Travel. Sass. Life” and it is just that. She’s such a lovely person to talk to; one of these people that you can instantly have a conversation with rather than the usual pleasantries and then never hearing from the other person again as the conversation was so dull that you fear that they had died of boredom.

The “Versatile Blogger Award” is in recognition of bloggers who post quality content/writing as well as those who offer a unique perspective on topics that may not be as widely talked about in such a personal way. Its aim is to recognise bloggers who you think make a real difference in the world/to the world of blogging. You can find the website for the award here and should refer to it if you have any questions that I may not be able to answer about it.

The Rules of Being Nominated Are:

·          Thank the person who gave you this award. 

·          Include a link to their blog — if you can figure out how to do it.

·          Select 15 blogs/bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly.

·          Nominate those 15 bloggers for the Versatile Blogger Award — include a link to this site.

·          Finally, tell the person who nominated you 7 things about yourself.

As you can see above, the Cairon at Travel Bear nominated me. You can find her Twitter here. I recommend giving her a follow; she’s so friendly and really does post quality content. I wholeheartedly agree with Tallulah for nominating her for it and you can read all about that by going to Cairon’s blog.

These are 7 things about me:

1. I have been blogging for years. I started out when I was about 12 (13 years ago now) when blogging really wasn’t a “thing” or that heard of.  Similarly; I have been working on websites for just as long. Aside from my blog, I have a website that I maintain but don’t ever advertise as being mine on Twitter.

2. I would love to be well enough to travel to close places like Ireland (you’ll get why after my next fact lol) and go on longer-haul flights to places such as Greece. I would love to go back to Bulgaria.

3. I love Westlife. Musically, they were my first loves and I was over the moon (still am) to have met them when I was 19.

4. I really want to be a published author. Writing is the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing when I go to sleep. I always have a notepad on me (physically or virtually via my phone/tablet).

5. I don’t think I’ve mentioned it before on my blog but I have OCD traits when I get really ill with anxiety. When I’m home alone I’m constantly checking doors and windows to make sure they are locked even if I  know for a fact that they are as I locked them myself.

6.  When I was well enough to work, a customer once offered to buy and ship me a bottle of wine (or 3 as they said!) for helping them out over the phone for being “so helpful, kind and understanding”. It really made my day as I had lost faith in humanity up until that point.

7. I find music really empowering/emotional. However; there a few songs that make me cry. Three of them are related to the grandparents I have lost. Believe it or not; “Dancing Queen” by Abba is one of them (long story).

My 15 Nominees Are:

*Courtney – UnfilteredMama. Courtney’s life story and posts are captivating.  She writes about her painful past experiences with an ex and her new life. She was also my first friend to come from blogging and she’s been nothing but supportive since our first chat. She also nominated me for my first blogger award which gave me a really helped with my confidence.

Bree – BilpolarBree. As you can tell by the title, Bree blogs about living with bipolar disorder. She also writes about dealing with anxiety & addiction. Bree’s posts read like diary/journal entries and she was the first blogger that I came across who wrote in this style. I find her writing intriguing and always leave wanting to read more from her.

*Katie – Katie’s Sanctuary. Lovely, lovely lass who blogs about beauty, lifestyle and mental health. As I’m not really a follower of anything to do with beauty (most days I can barely bring myself to brush my hair), it takes a really special person/blog to catch my eye. Katie’s did just that. What really sold reading posts about Lush hauls etc was just how friendly and enthusiastic about her blog she is which made me really want to read it.

*Kayleigh – My Little Brushneen Blog. Kayleigh is a family/lifestyle blogger who also posts about dealing with anxiety. One of her fonts reminds me of the styling of the “My Little Pony” brand so I felt a strong pull of nostalgia when I first viewed her blog. She’s another really nice lass who has made me feel so welcome in the blogging community.

*Phil – Moneyless Man. Phil is someone who I think is really hard-working. Not only is he working on getting himself out of debt (and succeeding), he’s also sharing his story/tips with you so that you have someone to share the journey with.

                                                                                                                              

Allanah – Allannah Louise. I’ve just discovered Allannah’s blog and I’m so glad that she was in my “recommended” list of who to follow on Twitter. Did you know that not only was her original blog deleted but she RESURECTED IT! If that isn’t motivation enough to keep going when life (and hosts) throw s*** your way then I don’t know what is.

Leila – Leila Land. I first came across Leila when I was looking for people to nominate for the Liebster Award. I was thoroughly miserable and at the end of my tether looking for bloggers who hadn’t been nominated and then there she was like this beacon of light. She was so nice when replying to this complete and utter stranger who was asking her if she had less than 200 subs on her blog and didn’t take me for being a complete weirdo (which I’m actually OK with). She blogs about beauty & lifestyle and she also has a stellar YouTube channel.

Jess – Queen Sapphire. Jess is such a lovely soul. We haven’t actually communicated with each other but I see her Tweets and her blog and that is enough for me to make that judgement about her. Jess blogs about just about everything which is great for people like me who aren’t interested in, say fashion posts, but love unboxings and posts about mental health.

Kathryn – Just Kathryn. Kathryn. Where do I start? Not only does she come across as such a genuinely kind person but she keeps going even when life gets tough. At least one of her posts has made me cry. Not because she’s talked about one of my triggers but because her writing really makes you feel whatever emotion she was going through when she wrote it. If you look for anything in a writer (whether it’s a blogger, freelancer or author etc) then it should be that.

Katie Lou -   A Mother’s Love. Katie Lou is a mermerising storyteller who I aspire to be like in my own (fictional) storytelling (not on my blog). She writes about depression and motherhood.

Tiffany – Food and other Loves. Tiffany was the first person to make me feel welcome to the blogging world. She encouraged me to post my first ever response to a tag (Mental Health) which I originally saw on her blog.

Lydia – mademoisellewomen. Lydia’s blog is home to her writings about living with asperger’s syndrome as well as reviews and interviews with authors, bloggers etc. Her blog caught my eye as someone really close to me also has aspergers syndrome and I thought her blog would be helpful in understanding it.  She also comes across as being really friendly in her writing.

Tamara – The Epileptic Blogger. Writing style inspiration right here. Another lady who not only makes me want to read every last word of hers, but who makes me want to better my own work. Fantastic writer.

Jude – Loving Mental Health. Jude is a new (in the last week) follower/followee (not a word but go with me on this one) of mine and she’s honestly such warm, kind lady. She writes about what it is like living with bipolar disease, and like with Bree’s posts, whilst it’s not something I relate to illness/mindset-wise, I do enjoy reading about how she keeps herself well. I hope to have many more conversations with her.

Bunnie – Happy Bunnie Blog. Bunnie blogs openly about her struggles with depression and food - both of which I relate to. She’s so honest about how she feels/is getting on and I find that endearing. She’s also a fan of Grace Helbig’s podcast, Not Too Deep, so she ticks all of my boxes in what I look for not only in whom I follow but who I reach out to as a potential friend.

Apologies if any of you have been nominated before but I think that it is wonderful that more than one person thought of you for said award. It means we read the requirements for the nominees and you were the first person/people we thought of. I’ve also included one/some of the reasons why I thought of you for this award (why you’ve made a difference in my life/ the blogging community/why others should check you out). Please let me know how you all get on with your award posts; I would love to have a read of them!

Anxiously,

Me

*Anyone with a * next to their name has also either been featured on my blog before or has inspired a post/tagged me in one. You can check out their guest posts below!

Courtney: Nominated me for the Liebster Award. Wrote a response to my Self-Care Q&A here.

Katie: Wrote a response to my Self-Care Q&A here.

Kayleigh: Wrote a response to my Self-Care Q&A here.

Phil: Wrote a response to my Self-Care Q&A here.

Tiffany: Discovered the Mental Health Tag on her blog.

** If any of my nominees want me to change/fix anything (the use of pronouns etc) then please let me know and I will do so accordingly. I completely understand if me getting something like that wrong makes you mad but I would appreciate not having any insults or horrible remarks thrown my way if you do need to correct me. It has not been (and never will be) my intention to hurt anyone.

You can find Anxiously, Me on:

This blog

Twitter: www.twitter.com/AnxiouslyMeBlog

Facebook: www.facebook.com/AnxiouslyMe

Instagram: www.instagram.com/AnxiouslyMeBlogger

Self-Care Q&A Response #7 - Katie

Self –Care Q &A/Tag

This week’s response comes from the glorious Katie! Read below to find out how she takes care of herself when she’s feeling down and how she knows when she needs some self-care. You can find her blog here and on Twitter.

1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

I know I'm in need of self-care when I start to feel run down or drained - sometimes it can even be that I notice I've let my nails chip or not washed my hair in days, then I'm like... ok, pull your finger out Katie.

2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

I really value alone time - I used to hate my own company, but now I'm like gimme more! I find peace in being quiet and being able to please myself.. that said my boyfriend makes me feel loved/safe/secure, so I value him a lot too.

3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

Sometimes, yes. I get it in my head that I'm being selfish or that there's a billion and one other things to be getting on with, like laundry or cleaning; but if I don't take care of me every now and again, I'm never gonna be able to tackle those billion and one other things! It's all about finding a balance.

4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

I live with a fair few people in the house and I don't always feel able to relax, I'm just on edge - but when I'm in my room I feel a lot better. Mostly I'm best when nobody else is home!

5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

100%! Like I said, I'll justify it that there's loads of other things to do, people will think I'm being selfish etc.

6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

I generally go with the flow, but if I feel like I'm reaching that point where I've pushed myself too hard or I'm drained, I'll make a point of going 'ok, so tonight I'm going to do this, this & that, just for me!'

7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

Not particularly, I guess I like to do my nails, skincare, eyebrows etc and feel like I've really taken the time to physically look after myself. I try to eat when I'm hungry, sleep when I'm tired, exercise a little - I think I just try to listen to my body and mind as much as poss!

8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

I like to have a hot bath (preferably with a Lush bubble bar!), listen to music, watch Harry Potter or a Disney - my boyfriend is brilliant, and my Grandad can be so uplifting to be around. I find running to be really good for me, especially if I'm feeling tense, and I definitely find blogging therapeutic, especially since I talk about mental health a lot - it's a good outlet!

9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

Funnily enough, it's only recently that I've started 'talking to myself' in an effort to pick myself up; whether it's just a "come on Katie, pick yourself up", or an "I WANT TO LIVE", in order to push myself to seize the day as much as I can, live in the moment a little. Sometimes it's just as simple as "You're ok". Surprisingly, it really can help.

10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?

Firstly I would say, you're not to feel guilty for making time for yourself - I know I'm one to preach! But it's crucial to take care of/& love yourself. It's like acceptance & it can make the world of difference. I've recently discovered the joys of my own company & not having to please other people all the time - which is a big deal for a self-confessed people-pleaser! My point is, if you want to do something, do it. Like to paint? Go paint. Like to swim? Go swim. Like to grow vegetables? Go grow! Doing things that make your soul happy makes pathways for more happiness.

~ Thanks again to Katie Rose for taking part! How do you  relax?

Anxiously,

Me

If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

You can find Anxiously Me in these 4 places:

Here on this blog

Twitter: www.twitter.com/AnxiouslyMeBlog

Facebook: www.facebook.com/AnxiouslyMe

Instagram: www.instagram.com/AnxiouslyMeBlogger

The Liebster Award! *Edited* 3/8/17

*Just a little note to say that this post has been edited. I was made aware of additional (to my post, they've always been part of this year's original award) requirements that were not sent to me via my nomination so I've added them in. I will put in bold what I have added and leave an * where I've changed the wording.

The Liebster Award.

Hi everyone! I was tagged by the lovely Courtney (www.unfilteredmamasite.wordpress.com) to do this tag! This tag was created to help new bloggers get discovered and to help them connect with the rest of the blogging community. The rules are:

1. Recognise who tagged you and promote their blog on your blog.
2. Answer all questions asked of you.
3. Create 11 NEW questions.
4. *Nominate 5-11 bloggers with under 200 followers.
5. Inform them.
6. Display the award on your blog (put it in your post). You can find free images here.
7. Write a 150-300 word piece about your favourite blog (not your own). Explain why and leave links.
8. Optional: include 10 random facts about yourself.

The questions asked to me were:


1. What type of blogger are you? How did you get to where you are right now?

I am a mental health (both personal and informational) blogger whose posts also fit in with the “lifestyle” category. I only created this blog back in April (3 months ago) and would post occasionally but I decided to get into a routine and started blogging twice a week from the end of June/beginning of July. Since doing so and tweeting out links every day I now have over 3k views, an established minimum view count per day and have had days where I’ve had 5x the amount of views as the previous day.



2. When do you find the time to blog?

I can’t work due to my mental health so I write posts more or less every day. As I mentioned above, I only post twice a week so I’m constantly stocking up on posts.



3. Out of all your published posts, which one is your favorite? Why?

I think the “Self-Care Q&A” has to be my favourite. It was the first time I had created my own Q&A and got such an overwhelming response from people wanting to take part that I had to put a cap on the number of people I sent out the questions to. I post their responses to the questions every Friday now.



4. What do you enjoy doing in your free time, besides blogging?

I write a lot of fictional stories and host an interactive story site. I enjoy a good book – more so in physical form than via audiobook or Kindle. I also love to sing and when I was well I loved going to concerts and comedy gigs.



5. If you could travel to any place in the world, where would you go?

I love Spain and Bulgaria and I would really love to go back. I also want to get well enough so that if I get any work opportunities through my blog I can travel to them.



6. Are you a book reader? What book would you recommend everyone to read?

I have been reading anything and everything I can get my hands on since I learned to read. For children and young teens I recommend any of Jacqueline Wilson’s books. My favourites as a child were “Lola Rose” and “The Dare Game” which is based on one of her most successful characters, Tracy Beaker. She also inspired me to write. For young adults I recommend Sara Shepard’s “Pretty Little Liars” series, “The Perfectionists”, “The Lying Game” and her new series “The Amateurs”.



7. Have you had any negative experiences with blogging? What did you do to overcome it?

The only negative thing I have witnessed whilst blogging wasn’t directed at me. It was basically “blogger drama” so I took on board the warnings that people where giving about working with specific bloggers who are known for scamming people and ignored all the rest. *I've also noticed that when talking about mental health some people try to make it a competition and try to invalidate how you're feeling if they don't deem it to be "as bad" as theirs.



8. Where are you from? Favorite place to go in your town?

I am from a city in Scotland called Stirling. My favourite place there is along the embankments of the river Forth. It’s so nice to sit there and watch the sun set. Admittedly, I haven’t been there in years.



9. What has surprised you the most about blogging and its large community?

I was surprised by how friendly most bloggers are. It’s so different to other communities that I have been a part of in the past. Mostly everyone is supportive and they will always help you out. Nothing is certain in the blogging world; it is what you make it. It's not a competition and you won't get very far thinking you are entitled to everything. I'm a big fan of the saying "what is for you will not go by you". If it's meant to be, it will be. Blog because you have a passion for it: not for freebies, money or even awards. At the end of the day people will remember you for how you were as person not how many awards you won or how many views you had.



10. What are your long-term goals for your blog?

My initial goal was to help just one person and that will always be my #1 goal. If I can help others not feel as alone as I did/do then it is a job well done (and a blog well blogged). It would be nice to make this my job and to be a freelance writer which has been one of my dreams for so long now. I feel like it’s something that I can definitely do and I don’t have to worry about being ill as I can take as much time out as needed without fear of getting fired.



11. Name something you can’t live without and explain why.

It’s going to sound really cheesy but I can’t live without my parents. They support me so much and if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t even attempt to go outside on my good days. I owe them a lot and if I can make a career out of blogging/freelancing then I can make a start on repaying them by contributing more to bills etc.



Here are 10 Random Facts About Me:

1. I used to perform in a children's circus every summer (as a child clown)
2. I still have the dollhouse that my grandad made me.
3. I'm terrified of needles.
4. Robots scare me too.
5. I've never seen "classic" movies such as "Dirty Dancing", the original "Ghostbusters" etc.
6. I've met various famous people (mostly Scottish) including Robbie Coltrane (Hagrid from Harry Potter).
7. I've been involved in several choirs including NYCoS.
8. I wanted to be an opera singer.
9. I own a website that most of you don't know about.
10. I really want to become a published author but lack the confidence to go after my dream.

For those that I tagged, here are your questions:

1. How did your blog come about/what or who inspired you to create one?

2. Who gives you the most #bloginspo (blog inspiration)?

3. Do you have a blogging schedule?

4. What do you think about automatic dms from bloggers you follow on Twitter?

5. Who was your first blogging friend?

6. If you could trade lives with another blogger, who would it be and why?

7. What does your preferred (physical) writing space look like? Is it at a table in café? Is it at a desk/table in your own home?

8. What fictional place would you like to travel to? Why?

9. If you could be a part of any TV show/Podcast/Movie cast which one would you chose and why?

10. Do you have a comfort item? For example a piece of clothing that makes you feel good, a treasured blanket from your past etc?

11. And last but not least: a silly question. If you were a colour; what colour would you be and what would you name yourself?



I nominate (11 + a cheeky extra as I lost track of how many):

1. Nikki @NerfMercy_ camerasandcanines.blogspot.com

2. Becca @mygirlsandmexo mygirlsandmesite.com

3. Nouf: @noufnotes noufnotes.wixsite.com/noufnotes

4. Phil: @themoneylessman moneylessman.co.uk

5. Tiffany: @sincerelytifff sincerelytiffany.com

6. Ana: @anaenglishblog thatenglishnerd.wordpress.com

7. Phannie @phanniebookworm phanniethegingerbookworm.wordpress.com

8. Saira: @acupofsai acupofsai.co.uk

9. Leila: @LeilaNeve leilaland.co.uk

10. Kloe: @Kloeslilcorner kloeslilcorner.weebly.com

11. Mariah: @VibesByMariah vibesbymariah.weebly.com

12. Faisal: @falidude allthingsrunningsite.wordpress.com

And my favourite blog (from my nominations) is...

How do I choose? I've talked to you all at some point for various lengths and all of our conversations are dear to me so it’s not been easy to pick.

I have chosen Becca’s (mygirlsandmesite) blog as we’ve conversed a lot and I always feel like I can have a good old moan with her without being judged. She is such a lovely person and that really shines through not only in her messages to me but across her blog and public social media posts.

She is a mummy and lifestyle blogger (and doing a cracking job at both!) who blogs simply because it’s fun and I really admire her for that. She’s down-to-earth and doesn’t let smashing new goals get to her head which is what I think is key when growing your blog/social media. Her posts are fun and engaging, and she’s not afraid to post cringe-y throwback photos (her words, not mine!). She’s also not afraid of posting pieces that are personal to her; her engagement story, what her children are getting up to etc and the fact that she has a crush on Leigh Francis (or Keith Lemon as you may know him) so, as you can tell, she’s very open and honest.

Becca is always friendly to everyone who leaves comments/sends her tweets and will let you rant to her if you’re having a bad time. She’s full of useful advice and whilst she is a small blogger herself, if she can help you out in any way then she will.
I could go on forever about just how amazing she is but my word count is nearly up. If my opinion of her doesn’t sway you to check her out then you should definitely check her out anyway and see for yourself. You can find her on Twitter, Facebook and on her blog. 


It stressed me out trying to find 11 people with less than 200 followers (I assumed it was on their blog and was not aware that 11 wasn't a set number until nearly a week after posting and nearly a month after receiving my nomination) so I literally messaged around to find out who hadn’t done this tag yet and ended up with these 12 nominations! If you're struggling to find bloggers with less than 200 followers then ask around and feel free to ask me to send out a message for you as the lovely Char (@forgedopulence) did for me.

#5 Self-Care Q&A - Ams' Response

Self-Care Q&A - Ams' Response

Ams is our contributor this week! Keep reading to find out what her views on self-care are. You can find her links at the bottom :)

1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

A: When is long overdue both my mind and body tells me it's time. My mood swings are over the top, energy is gone and the weight in my mind and chest slowly drains me.

2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

Let me just say the alone time it's a must especially when it comes to taking care of yourself. I personally do both but I always start with some alone time, not only do I enjoy it but it's necessary for my own mental health. I need to heal myself first before I go to someone. Of course, I always run to my boyfriend when I need the extra love and care.

3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

No, I honestly don't. Even when I'm super busy with balancing work and life I try to always do at least the smallest things for myself, even if that means spending an extra 20 minutes in the shower or taking a late night drive, or even laying in complete silence in bed I try to get it done.

4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

It depends on the type of "me" time I'm doing. If I'm trying to relax at home and there's too much going on I get irritated really easy and I can't enjoy it, the vibe goes out the window. If I’m trying to get my thoughts out or working on ideas for the blog I need to be in complete silence or else everything is going downhill. But other than that I have learned to balance on having some me time and still be surrounded by people.

5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

NOPE! And you shouldn't either. For your sanity this is necessary no matter how many plans you cancelled last minute (done that) or feelings you hurt (done that too), you need to put yourself first, because when both your mind and body are telling you to take care of yourself you better do it and not care whose feelings you’re hurting on the way. I don't feel guilty because I'm truly the only person that understands and deals with myself every day all day, I come first.

6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

Both, like I mentioned before I always try to do at least the smallest thing for myself, a drive alone, go to the park/beach and enjoy the view, manicure, and pedicure alone, or even a facial at home after a long day. I schedule me time for those times when life gets really busy and I need to work around a schedule to be able to get everything done, so I put some time to take myself out to eat or even cancel a day (Sunday) and just let it be for me. I also schedule a “me” time for when I'm on vacation, I take a day or half a day to date away from everyone and enjoy the vacation by myself (which I recommend).

7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

I don't think I have a routine; I just like to incorporate as many things that feed my sanity to my daily routine and that can be from the smallest to the biggest thing.

8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

My blog. When I say focusing on my blog has saved me/brought me back to who I am, is not an understatement. But I always start with finding a place where I can be in complete silence. Why? Because I can't just distract myself for that moment, the feelings will come back to haunt me. I need the time in silence to let it all out or to just let it sink in, and once few minutes have gone by I start to do things that make me happy. Get some food, enjoy the day, go for a walk, work on the blog, etc. If I'm at work I put my headphones on and escape the noise or walk to my car and sit in silence during my lunch break.

 9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

I'm constantly talking to myself and telling my mind to not go there. I always make sure I give myself all the compliments in the world (I have to be my biggest fan), and I also read a lot of motivational quotes when I need the extra push.

10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?

I will just say, START cancelling plans and STOP feeling guilty about putting your needs first. Even the smallest thing that you do for yourself counts. Stay in the car an extra 5 minutes to get away from people, watch the sunset by yourself, lock some doors and breath! Or just simply cancel a day. But most importantly don't depend on anyone to make you feel better, do it yourself. Enjoy to be alone; you will learn so much about yourself.

~ Thanks for reading! You can find Ams on Twitter and on her blog.

QoTD: What is your number one go-to that helps you relax? 

Anxiously,

Me.

If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

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Alcohol & Me: Why I Rarely Drink

Blog 8: Why I Rarely Drink

Please bear in mind that I live in the UK so the legal drinking age is 18. For more information please go to Drink Aware.

Like a lot of teenagers, I used to drink. I’m not talking getting black-out-drunk (anxiety prevents me from doing so and I’m also the mumsy-take-care-of-everyone type); but at least 50% of the time I had with my friends was spent drinking either at their homes or at parties. Back then, I enjoyed drinking; it was a way to blow off steam and gave me a huge boost in confidence that I was severely lacking. I want to make it clear that I was in no way an alcoholic; it was just drinking on Friday or Saturday nights and during what would be school breaks – not every night and certainly not during the day. I have learnt over the years that with my anxiety and depression comes a tendency to binge/obsess over things so my need to constantly drink alcohol when I was drinking with friends could be explained through that. It’s why I can’t just watch one episode (or series) of a programme and need to have to complete series of books before I can start reading the first one.

These days (the last 3 years), I drink far less frequently. I very rarely go out due to my anxiety and when I do, I try to refrain from alcohol as it really depresses me (it is a depressant, after all) and I tend to feel more paranoid even if I only have one drink. If I do have a drink, I need to be in a really good mood and so on-the-go that I don’t have time to think about anything right up until I fall asleep otherwise I’ll be awake all night worrying.

Worrying is also a big part of why I rarely drink, or even go out with, people who tend to go out of control. Whilst I am the type to make sure everyone is OK, it is stressful. I’m so aware that people can get alcohol poisoning, and that, if they haven’t blacked out, they are likely to be vomiting. When you’re the designated caretaker (whether it’s self-volunteered or not) it’s rather scary to have friends who are alcoholics and/or are binge drinkers but who also deal with severe mental health issues. I don’t know how to take care of them and so I would hope that by saying that I’m not going to drink (around my friends who aren’t as dependant on alcohol as other friends) would serve as some sort of example. I also don’t tend to hang around them if they have been drinking as a lot of the time they will try to convince me to drink with them which isn’t something I want. I like making my own decisions – I have to for my own physical and mental health – and it makes me dislike being around those who try to persuade me  as it appears that they don’t respect my decisions. Luckily now I only have one friend that I see regularly (who has been dealing with mental health issues and problems with alcohol) that now respects my decision not to drink and knows that if I am over at her house it is to make sure she and her family are OK. I care too much about her to be an enabler.

That is why I stay away from alcohol as much as possible. Sure, in the fridge I have at least two bottles of vodka that people have given me as holiday gifts but they have been in there for at least two years now with no chance of me opening them any time soon. It’s not hard for me to not drink; I don’t have an interest in it anymore and, as I said before, I need to be in a really good mood before I’ll even consider ordering alcohol of any kind. Also, what with being on medication for said anxiety and depression, mixing alcohol with medication isn’t advised. I did try to have an alcoholic drink at a party once whilst on them and it just made me so tired that I had to leave earlier than I had planned.  I certainly don’t recommend it either. I have seen what it does to close friends and I don’t want to end up going down the route. I know where my compulsions lie now and that helps keep me on track.

Anxiously,

Me