Sunday 30 July 2017

#5 Self-Care Q&A - Ams' Response

Self-Care Q&A - Ams' Response


Ams is our contributor this week! Keep reading to find out what her views on self-care are. You can find her links at the bottom :)


1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

A: When is long overdue both my mind and body tells me it's time. My mood swings are over the top, energy is gone and the weight in my mind and chest slowly drains me.


2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

Let me just say the alone time it's a must especially when it comes to taking care of yourself. I personally do both but I always start with some alone time, not only do I enjoy it but it's necessary for my own mental health. I need to heal myself first before I go to someone. Of course, I always run to my boyfriend when I need the extra love and care.


3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

No, I honestly don't. Even when I'm super busy with balancing work and life I try to always do at least the smallest things for myself, even if that means spending an extra 20 minutes in the shower or taking a late night drive, or even laying in complete silence in bed I try to get it done.


4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

It depends on the type of "me" time I'm doing. If I'm trying to relax at home and there's too much going on I get irritated really easy and I can't enjoy it, the vibe goes out the window. If I’m trying to get my thoughts out or working on ideas for the blog I need to be in complete silence or else everything is going downhill. But other than that I have learned to balance on having some me time and still be surrounded by people.


5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

NOPE! And you shouldn't either. For your sanity this is necessary no matter how many plans you cancelled last minute (done that) or feelings you hurt (done that too), you need to put yourself first, because when both your mind and body are telling you to take care of yourself you better do it and not care whose feelings you’re hurting on the way. I don't feel guilty because I'm truly the only person that understands and deals with myself every day all day, I come first.


6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

Both, like I mentioned before I always try to do at least the smallest thing for myself, a drive alone, go to the park/beach and enjoy the view, manicure, and pedicure alone, or even a facial at home after a long day. I schedule me time for those times when life gets really busy and I need to work around a schedule to be able to get everything done, so I put some time to take myself out to eat or even cancel a day (Sunday) and just let it be for me. I also schedule a “me” time for when I'm on vacation, I take a day or half a day to date away from everyone and enjoy the vacation by myself (which I recommend).


7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

I don't think I have a routine; I just like to incorporate as many things that feed my sanity to my daily routine and that can be from the smallest to the biggest thing.


8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

My blog. When I say focusing on my blog has saved me/brought me back to who I am, is not an understatement. But I always start with finding a place where I can be in complete silence. Why? Because I can't just distract myself for that moment, the feelings will come back to haunt me. I need the time in silence to let it all out or to just let it sink in, and once few minutes have gone by I start to do things that make me happy. Get some food, enjoy the day, go for a walk, work on the blog, etc. If I'm at work I put my headphones on and escape the noise or walk to my car and sit in silence during my lunch break.


 9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

I'm constantly talking to myself and telling my mind to not go there. I always make sure I give myself all the compliments in the world (I have to be my biggest fan), and I also read a lot of motivational quotes when I need the extra push.


10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?


I will just say, START cancelling plans and STOP feeling guilty about putting your needs first. Even the smallest thing that you do for yourself counts. Stay in the car an extra 5 minutes to get away from people, watch the sunset by yourself, lock some doors and breath! Or just simply cancel a day. But most importantly don't depend on anyone to make you feel better, do it yourself. Enjoy to be alone; you will learn so much about yourself.


~ Thanks for reading! You can find Ams on Twitter and on her blog.

QoTD: What is your number one go-to that helps you relax? 


Anxiously,

Me.


If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

Find Anxiously, Me on:

or via email at anxiouslymeblog@gmail.com 

Friday 28 July 2017

#4 Phil's Self-Care Q&A Response!

This week’s response was given to me by Phil over at @themoneylessman on Twitter. (moneylessman.co.uk)! Let’s get a move on, shall we?

1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?
Phil: As someone who's suffered with OCD for the last 4 years, I tend to know that I'm in need of some self-care when I start feeling anxious. I don't tend to have panic attacks, but can feel not quite right under the surface. Symptoms of this will usually arise in the form of sadness, irritability, or mental fatigue.


2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?
I tend to look after myself on my own, but it definitely helps to have someone you feel comfortable enough to discuss your feelings with. A little reassurance can go a long way.


3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?
I find it very difficult to make time for myself. Now that I've set quite ambitious goals, I struggle to find enough hours in the day.


4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?
I find that trying to juggle a lot of different business avenues can spill over into my "me" time. I also feel obligated to try to socialise with others at times when I don't really want to.


5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?
Yes. I find it difficult to switch off from work, and feel guilty at times for relaxing. Sometimes I will stop watching a TV show because I feel like I should be working if I'm not sleeping.


6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?
I used to fit in "me" time whenever I could, but the time I found for this became less and less. I've recently started scheduling "me" time and find that this stops the feeling of guilt somewhat. For example, I make sure that I make time to go to the gym most days, which is great for my mental health as well as physical health.


7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?
As mentioned above, I do try to follow a schedule for certain parts of "me" time. I try to make sure that I set some time aside where nothing else will get in the way. For me, that's going to watch the football team I support. During this time, I make a promise to myself to completely switch off from work etc.


8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?
I like the escapism that can be found in fiction books. I also like to keep myself active, and listen to music. I never turn down a Netflix binge session either...


9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?
I don't have a mantra really, but I do like to reflect on some of Tony Robbins' quotes. "The path to success is to take massive, determined action". This tends to get me in the right frame of mind to make progress each day.


10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?
I think it's important to set some time aside for yourself, away from the daily stresses of life. I can't recommend meditation enough for people in need of self-care. There are plenty of free apps that will guide you through lots of different types of meditation, and it has a HUGE effect on your mental state.


~ That’s just one more from the stack of responses over with for another week. Be sure to check out Phil’s site (moneylessman.co.uk) and follow him on Twitter.

Do you have a mantra that you like to remind yourself of when you’re feeling down? Also: what are you thoughts on this format? Do you prefer this post's layout or previous ones I've used? 

Anxiously,

Me


If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

You can email me at anxiouslymeblog@gmail.com or you can find me on:
Twitter
Facebook
& Instagram

Sunday 23 July 2017

Untagging on Twitter

Isn't it annoying when, with the new Twitter update, you end up having to reply to everyone tagged instead of just being able to delete their names like you used to be able to do?

Imagine how much more annoying it is when you're inundated with said replies just because the original poster tagged you and those replying haven't untagged you. It can be rather disappointing when you're waiting on a specific tweet back from someone and see a notification only to find it's from a conversation that you're not apart of.

Here's how to untag other people from a Twitter reply in few easy steps. 

First: click on the speech bubble to reply to the Tweet you are tagged in/wish to reply to:



You will then see this (obviously with different names): 



Click on the names tagged:



Then untick the box(es) next to the name(s) you wish to NOT reply to:


Click "save": 



And then you are free to reply like so: 



Now that you know how to untag people from replies/conversations let me know if there is anything else you would like steps on how to do. I'm thinking of making this a "bonus" feature on the blog and would like some suggestions.

Anxiously (when I see so many replies I think "what have I done?"),

Me


You can find me on Twitter and Instagram as well as on this blog.

Saturday 22 July 2017

Alcohol & Me: Why I Rarely Drink

Blog 8: Why I Rarely Drink


Please bear in mind that I live in the UK so the legal drinking age is 18. For more information please go to Drink Aware.

Like a lot of teenagers, I used to drink. I’m not talking getting black-out-drunk (anxiety prevents me from doing so and I’m also the mumsy-take-care-of-everyone type); but at least 50% of the time I had with my friends was spent drinking either at their homes or at parties. Back then, I enjoyed drinking; it was a way to blow off steam and gave me a huge boost in confidence that I was severely lacking. I want to make it clear that I was in no way an alcoholic; it was just drinking on Friday or Saturday nights and during what would be school breaks – not every night and certainly not during the day. I have learnt over the years that with my anxiety and depression comes a tendency to binge/obsess over things so my need to constantly drink alcohol when I was drinking with friends could be explained through that. It’s why I can’t just watch one episode (or series) of a programme and need to have to complete series of books before I can start reading the first one.

These days (the last 3 years), I drink far less frequently. I very rarely go out due to my anxiety and when I do, I try to refrain from alcohol as it really depresses me (it is a depressant, after all) and I tend to feel more paranoid even if I only have one drink. If I do have a drink, I need to be in a really good mood and so on-the-go that I don’t have time to think about anything right up until I fall asleep otherwise I’ll be awake all night worrying.

Worrying is also a big part of why I rarely drink, or even go out with, people who tend to go out of control. Whilst I am the type to make sure everyone is OK, it is stressful. I’m so aware that people can get alcohol poisoning, and that, if they haven’t blacked out, they are likely to be vomiting. When you’re the designated caretaker (whether it’s self-volunteered or not) it’s rather scary to have friends who are alcoholics and/or are binge drinkers but who also deal with severe mental health issues. I don’t know how to take care of them and so I would hope that by saying that I’m not going to drink (around my friends who aren’t as dependant on alcohol as other friends) would serve as some sort of example. I also don’t tend to hang around them if they have been drinking as a lot of the time they will try to convince me to drink with them which isn’t something I want. I like making my own decisions – I have to for my own physical and mental health – and it makes me dislike being around those who try to persuade me  as it appears that they don’t respect my decisions. Luckily now I only have one friend that I see regularly (who has been dealing with mental health issues and problems with alcohol) that now respects my decision not to drink and knows that if I am over at her house it is to make sure she and her family are OK. I care too much about her to be an enabler.

That is why I stay away from alcohol as much as possible. Sure, in the fridge I have at least two bottles of vodka that people have given me as holiday gifts but they have been in there for at least two years now with no chance of me opening them any time soon. It’s not hard for me to not drink; I don’t have an interest in it anymore and, as I said before, I need to be in a really good mood before I’ll even consider ordering alcohol of any kind. Also, what with being on medication for said anxiety and depression, mixing alcohol with medication isn’t advised. I did try to have an alcoholic drink at a party once whilst on them and it just made me so tired that I had to leave earlier than I had planned.  I certainly don’t recommend it either. I have seen what it does to close friends and I don’t want to end up going down the route. I know where my compulsions lie now and that helps keep me on track.

Anxiously,


Me

Friday 21 July 2017

Self-Care Q&A Response #3 (Fixed)

Note: Tried fixing the original post's font size a total of 6 times but it's just not working. Hoping this version will!

Here is the 3rd instalment of responses to the “Self-Care Q &A” that I am hosting! Nouf is our contributor this week so please check out her links! (@NoufNotes)!


1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

N: I personally know when I need self-care when my mood drops and I start to care less about important things.


2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

I rarely have time to be alone because I am a full time student and work all the time, so personally I prefer when I set time for self-care it is by myself.


3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

Yes. I have such a busy schedule it’s hard to set time for myself when I’m trying to manage academics, work, a social life, and my health.


4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

Outside noise is the most disruptive for me. I usually listen to music during my time set aside and it is hard to have to hear other things while the music is playing.


5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

I would be lying if I didn’t say yes. I think besides setting time aside for self-care this is one of the reasons it is so hard. I feel guilty in the sense that I feel I should be “more productive” with the time. Obviously self-care is a necessity that everyone should set time aside for, but when you have so much to do it can be hard to remember and not dis-value it.


6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

I “go with the flow.” I usually know when I need it by how my body has been acting physically and emotionally.


7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

I don’t necessarily have a routine, but there are some things I always try to do. I usually put on a face mask, play some music, and meditate. This is a great way to slow down, clear your head and unwind after a long day. After that I love going to the monuments (It’s an #OnlyAtGW hobby I cherish. Plus it is always pretty!). Being outside and feeling the sun on your skin instantly brightens up my mood.


8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

Definitely spending time with friends is a great activity that always cheers me up. I am grateful to say I have such a great group of friends that always radiate positive vibes (when they are not roasting me). This is my go to when I am feeling down because it is guaranteed laughter and good times.


9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

One of my flaws is that I constantly compare myself. I push myself harder than anyone else can. Rather than judging what I haven’t accomplished, I realized it is okay to remind myself that “I am enough.”


10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?

Turn off your phone to avoid any outside notifications (just for the moment). The world is moving at such a fast pace that we forget to just slow down, take note of what we need, and know it’s okay to be still for a second.


~ And just like that we are at the end of the post again! You can find Nouf on Twitter and the link to her blog can be found here!

What do you think about the Self Care Q&A responses so far? Do you agree with anything that the contributors have said? Do you have a self-care routine (or segment of one) that hasn’t been spoken about yet?

Anxiously,
Me



If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

Self-Care Q&A Response #3

*Edit Note: I have fixed the font size 4 times now but it keeps reverting back to the smallest font size which I have never set it as. No idea what is going on.


Here is the 3rd instalment of responses to the “Self-Care Q &A” that I am hosting! Nouf is our contributor this week so please check out her links! (@NoufNotes)!


1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

N: I personally know when I need self-care when my mood drops and I start to care less about important things.


2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

I rarely have time to be alone because I am a full time student and work all the time, so personally I prefer when I set time for self-care it is by myself.


3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

Yes. I have such a busy schedule it’s hard to set time for myself when I’m trying to manage academics, work, a social life, and my health.


4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

Outside noise is the most disruptive for me. I usually listen to music during my time set aside and it is hard to have to hear other things while the music is playing.


5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

I would be lying if I didn’t say yes. I think besides setting time aside for self-care this is one of the reasons it is so hard. I feel guilty in the sense that I feel I should be “more productive” with the time. Obviously self-care is a necessity that everyone should set time aside for, but when you have so much to do it can be hard to remember and not dis-value it.


6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

I “go with the flow.” I usually know when I need it by how my body has been acting physically and emotionally.


7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

I don’t necessarily have a routine, but there are some things I always try to do. I usually put on a face mask, play some music, and meditate. This is a great way to slow down, clear your head and unwind after a long day. After that I love going to the monuments (It’s an #OnlyAtGW hobby I cherish. Plus it is always pretty!). Being outside and feeling the sun on your skin instantly brightens up my mood.


8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

Definitely spending time with friends is a great activity that always cheers me up. I am grateful to say I have such a great group of friends that always radiate positive vibes (when they are not roasting me). This is my go to when I am feeling down because it is guaranteed laughter and good times.


9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

One of my flaws is that I constantly compare myself. I push myself harder than anyone else can. Rather than judging what I haven’t accomplished, I realized it is okay to remind myself that “I am enough.”


10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?

Turn off your phone to avoid any outside notifications (just for the moment). The world is moving at such a fast pace that we forget to just slow down, take note of what we need, and know it’s okay to be still for a second.


~ And just like that we are at the end of the post again! You can find Nouf on Twitter and the link to her blog can be found here!

What do you think about the Self Care Q&A responses so far? Do you agree with anything that the contributors have said? Do you have a self-care routine (or segment of one) that hasn’t been spoken about yet? 

Also, just as a reminder, I always reply to your comments (usually within hours as I'm hardly offline these days). I also get really anxious over my posts - whether the size is too big/small, if it's too long, if the spacing looks weird/bad etc - so if you have any helpful advice, I really would appreciate it.

Anxiously,
Me


If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

You can find me on Twitter, Instagram and here on this blog :)

Sunday 16 July 2017

Caffeine & Me

Note: I’ve tried to word things in a way so that they wouldn’t trigger anyone but if you are affected by subjects such as losing weight & eating then this is a little disclaimer that those topics are covered.


Why I Quit Caffeine.

For those of you who know me, you will know that I love coffee. I would get a cappuccino before my lectures at college started, refill during breaks and always had a constant supply when I was working. I very rarely actually made the coffee; I would buy it from local businesses, the college canteen and pre-made cups sold by coffee brands to the corner shop. You might think that this is weird for a coffee lover but I have only ever been into Starbucks once (blasphemy, I know) and as of January this year decided to cut it out of my diet. Not only did I cut out coffee but I also ditched the energy drinks and fizzy juices. Here are my reasons why I cut out caffeine and how it affected me:

1. I wanted to lose weight. Losing weight has always been something that I have found difficult to achieve because of medical reasons but my relationship with caffeine was something that I decided was also a factor in not losing weight.  I had a look at the nutritional values on the packaged and found that the numbers were far higher than I wanted them to be. All the pre-prepared coffee and carbonated drinks were packed full of calories (not to mention sugars & fats) that weren’t even making me feel full so those plus snacking/eating meals was having an effect on my weight.  Therefore I switched to only drinking water and structuring out my meals to coincide with the daily nutritional guidelines.

2. I want to keep my teeth. I may not care about my outward appearance but I am rather fond of my teeth. As you all know: sugary drinks are bad for your teeth and erodes them. I have anxiety-induced dreams of mine falling out and, to be honest, I need them for chewing. I also didn’t spend years in braces just for them to get ruined. Plus paranoia over coffee breath just wasn’t worth it.

3. Caffeine also makes me extremely jittery. As soon as I realised that this was a factor in my anxiety, I cut it down. Removing it is something that I could cut out to reduce anxiety and hopefully help me have a better night’s sleep.

I expected it to be hard but despite having a couple of beverages here and there, it’s actually been a whole lot easier than I thought it would be. I used to rely on it making me feel more awake but it would never work when I needed it to and would only kick in as I was trying to get to sleep. For the last 3 years I’ve been working on drinking more water (and basically not taking any unexpected trips to the dentist) so ditching the fizzy drinks was more of a natural occurrence and I have to say; I don’t miss them.
In the end, cutting out caffeine has helped me in my battle with anxiety. Not only do I sleep better but I’ve also been losing weight steadily (with a diet & lifestyle change) and I’ve not had to have any more treatment done at the dentist bar my usual check-ups. I will occasionally let myself have a coffee or fizzy drink but only on days when I feel really good otherwise it makes me shaky and I go on a downward spiral mentally. I don’t miss it and the effects have only been positive.

So what about you, dear reader? Have you tried cutting out caffeine? If you haven’t; do you think you could?

See you on Friday!

Slightly less anxiously,

Me

Friday 14 July 2017

Self-Care Q& A with Jenny (Jenny in Neverland) #selfcareqanda

 Welcome back to the “Self-Care Q &A”! This week’s response section is dedicated to the wonderful Jenny (www.jennyinneverland.com/ @jennymarston_xo)! Still working out font, sizing etc so please bare with me! 


1. How do you know when you are in need of some self-care?

J: I usually know if I'm feeling particular anxious: more so than usual. Or if I'm feeling more down than usual. Those two things are always a reminder than I might need to step back and chill out.


2. Once you are aware that you need to take care of yourself, do you usually do so alone or do you have someone you can go to when you need some TLC?

I always practice self care alone. Often, being around other people makes it worse. On the occasion it doesn't but it's hard to differentiate when I need another person and when I don't so usually I keep to myself.


3. Do you find it hard to make time for yourself?

Ummm, in terms of doing things just because I enjoy them and just being "me", yes. Because I'm always worked up about or thinking about something else like blogging, work, life, other people.


4. Is there anything that gets in the way of your “me” time/disrupts it (for me: noises outside can put me on edge or if other people are home I need to be mindful of how long I take, say, in the shower)?

The major thing that gets in the way of my me time and self care is other people - specifically their moods. I'm majorly affected by other people's moods and if they've had a bad day, than can instantly make me feel rubbish and have a crap day too.


5. Do you ever feel guilty for having “me” time?

Nope, never! No one should ever feel guilty for looking after themselves.


6. Do you schedule in “me” time or do you “go with the flow”/only take “me” time when you feel you need it?

I tend to go with the flow and see what happens from day to day.


7. Is there a self-care routine that you try to follow?

No specific routine but there obviously are certain self care activities I like to do.


8. When you feel down/not like your usual self; what do you do to cheer yourself up (hobbies, being with loved ones etc)?

I like to get a cup of tea and chocolate and watch my favourite YouTuber. Or cook myself a meal or watch a documentary.


9. Do you have any mantras that you say to yourself as a pick me up or on a daily basis?

Not on a daily basis but if there's something stressful going on I'll always remind myself that this won't last forever. This stressful phase won't last forever and it'll pass - just like everything else. And that usually makes me feel better.


10. Finally; do you have any self-care tips for anyone who might be reading this?

Find something that works for you. Don't just do what everyone else is telling you to do. And take care of the basics first: eat, drink a glass of water, have a shower, get dressed. Take CARE of yourself.


~ That’s all for this week! Thank you to Jenny for taking part! You can find her on Twitter and if you want to see what she’s been getting up to, you can find her blog at www.jennyinneverland.com! Just click on the underlined words and they will take you straight to her!

Do you have any self-care tips for other people? Is there a specific thing you like to do when you’re feeling down or anxious? Let me know in either the comments below or feel free to dm me on Twitter.

Anxiously,
Me


If you decide to use this, please let me know first and give credit. There’s nothing worse than finding out something that you worked really hard on has been taken and uncredited, sometimes even plagiarised.

Get To Know Me Part 2

Hi everyone! Here is part 2 of the "Get To Know Me" post that I did last Friday to celebrate one year of being with Blogger. If ...

Anxiously, Me